Below are the biographical information about the two important Americans, John Adams and Thomas Jefferson. Firstly, John Adams is an important person in the American Revolution the same as Thomas Jefferson. Besides, they both delegated to the continental Congress. Furthermore, John Adams was the signer of Declaration of Independence like Thomas Jefferson. What’s more, not only was John Adams a third president of United State United State
What’s more, not only was John Adams a third president of United State but also Thomas Jefferson studied and practiced law.
ReplyDelete這句連接的東西不太對吧~~
The most important of all, both of them are the great president in United State.
president-->presidents
in United State-->in the United States
沒了~~呵呵!!
Firstly, John Adams is an important person in the American Revolution the same as Thomas Jefferson.
ReplyDelete>> Firstly, John Adams is an important person in the American Revolution which is the same as Thomas Jefferson.
Besides, they both delegated to the continental Congress.
>> Besides, they both are delegates to the continental Congress.
What’s more, not only was John Adams a third president of United State but also Thomas Jefferson studied and practiced law
上面他們連接的東西不對等 所以整個都是錯的
John Adams is an important person in the American Revolution the same as Thomas Jefferson. 這裡用法好奇怪 跟大家不一樣
ReplyDelete剩下的就同上囉~
Below are the biographical information about the two important Americans, John Adams and Thomas Jefferson.=> --John Adams and Thomas Jefferson.
ReplyDeleteFirstly, John Adams is an important person in the American Revolution the same as Thomas Jefferson. =>這個地方有點奇怪~應該要加關代
What’s more, not only was John Adams a third president of United State but also Thomas Jefferson studied and practiced law.=>連接的東西是不一樣的~整句都有問題喔!!
要空格唷
ReplyDeleteimportant出現兩次，建議可以將其中換成crucial唷~
What’s more, not only was John Adams a third president of United State but also Thomas Jefferson studied and practiced law.
痾你是不是寫錯了＠＠!!! XD 哈哈哈哈哈
Firstly, John Adams is an important person in the American Revolution the same as Thomas Jefferson. 這句怪怪的~
ReplyDelete可以用其他both或Similarity,的句型替代!
可以加上一些句子說他們有多偉大之類的=)
the same as Thomas Jefferson// so is Thomas Jefferson
ReplyDeletenot only was John Adams a third president of United State but also Thomas Jefferson studied and practiced law.
這句好奇怪!
連接詞的用法挺怪的,多注意喔~~
倒數第三行 not only was John Adams a third president of United State but also Thomas Jefferson studied and practiced law.
ReplyDelete前後寫的東西不一樣
最後一行 both of them are the great president
president要加s喔
空兩格，
ReplyDeleteWhat’s more, not only was John Adams a third president of United State but also Thomas Jefferson studied and practiced law.
→連接的東西不一樣，應該不能用not only...but also
怪怪的!
前面有些連接詞好像也不太對喔!