It goes without saying that getting married is an important decision in everyone’s life.It is because that getting married means that we have to live with our beloved husband once and for all. As a result, it is necessary for us to take several factors below into account in order to lead a pleasure future. To begin with, after getting married, we may have a hard time with doing what we want to do, such us traveling, seeing movie and so forth. Taking care of little baby may occupy most of my free time. Moreover, based on scientific research, after giving birth to the third baby, our ability to memorize may decline rapidly far form our image. What’s more, we may do lot of self-sacrifice for our family. So, before we get married, it is important for us to consider it over and over again.
沒空兩格唷~ 每次都忘，= 笨死了 = 哈哈哈
ReplyDelete第六行 have a hard time with doing
(with + 名詞唷，要去掉唷~)
可是我有疑問To begin with, after getting married, we may have a hard time with doing what we want to do, such us traveling, seeing movie and so forth. 為什麼有困難押＠ˋ＠?!!
痾，不知道這篇有沒有離題，總覺得沒談到effect又好像有
不過可以確定的是你的結論句沒有，怪怪
So, before we get married, it is important for us to consider it over and over again.
空兩格唷
ReplyDeletepleasure future--> pleasant future
have a hard time with doing
with可省唷
far form our image
喔喔~~拼錯囉from
不過個人認為結婚還是一件好事...
第五行 we may have a hard time with doing what ... 不用with
ReplyDelete倒數第3行may decline rapidly far form our image
是from
其他的沒啥錯誤~
such us是such as喔~
ReplyDelete很通順喔~
不過好像有點偏題喔~
可以多補充一些原因和影響=)
It is because that getting married means that we have to live with our beloved husband once and for all.=>其實我覺得Husband比較不客觀耶~畢竟文章本身並沒有限定要給誰看XDD
ReplyDeletewe may have a hard time with doing what we want to do,=>Have a hard time後面直接加ving就好了~
Taking care of little baby may occupy most of my free time.=>主詞應該是我們"讀者"而不是"你"喔~
our ability to memorize may decline rapidly far form our image=>far form our image我覺得可以不用~前面的就足夠了~
we may do lot of self-sacrifice for our family=>lots of~
So, before we get married, it is important for us to consider it over and over again最後的結論句我覺得跟主題不太符合~
we may have a hard time with doing what we want to do, such us traveling, seeing movie and so forth.
ReplyDelete// we may have a hard time doing what we want to do, such as 後面的東西要改掉很怪!!
4th occupy most of my free time照顧寶寶應該不只是空閒時間吧 如果是這樣他也太可憐了:(
結論句怪怪的! 這篇是要寫影響 你怎麼會結論說 在結婚資前我們必須再三思?
we may have a hard time with doing what we want to do.
ReplyDeletehard time後直接接ving(省略in)就ok了~不用with
seeing movie可以+s
怎麼到後面就不是在講結婚了o__o||
變成再講小孩...